I was contacted last week about my ex-husband's upcoming hearing. Jane Gilbertston from the Clay County Attorney Office's Crime Victims Unit left me a voice mail explaining that Tom would be appearing in court today to answer to his probation violations. These violations stemmed from his breaking probation on several levels since the last hearing in March, including failing to report to serve his 90 days in jail, and leaving his state of residence without permission.

Tom was finally located in Arizona when he was stopped for a routine traffic violation. He was arrested at that time when running his ID turned up a warrant for his arrest that Clay County had issued for the above violations. He was held for extradition and returned about 5 or 6 days ago, brought back by Clay Couny Sheriff Department deputies.

I attended the hearing today with Chris and Jane, before the same judge that sentenced him in March. At that time, I expressed my doubt in court that he would serve the time, and the judge today expressed his own doubts he had at the time and the disgust he felt now with how Tom chose to behave. Tom's attorney expressed typical excuses, but they fell on deaf ears as far as the court was concerned. I found out from Jane that Tom had been working for relatives in Pennsylvania, but had been fired by them due to a 'bad attitude'. That's pretty sad when you get fired even by relatives, but I remember all too well how Tom never felt he was wrong, was argumentative, etc., etc. Unfortunately it's obvious he hasn't learned any lessons from the many opportunities in his life he has wasted, and lives he has hurt, including his own.

In the end, he was sentenced to two years in Minnesota state prison for his felony conviction of failure to provide child support. His current balance is over $91,700. Despite his inability to pay much if any of the back support while in prison due to low wages there, the judge still held him accountable to pay whatever possible out of any wages he might earn while in custody.

Jane explained to me that after processing and placement, it would take more time after that for him to obtain a job in prison. Then, according to law he keeps the first $100 earned for the funds all prisoners get when released. By the time he earns over that amount, if he ever does, the amount I might see will be very little. She did explain that she will send me information on how to track his time in prison as well as keeping an eye on his release date by giving me the Minnesota Department of Correction website page where I can input information and bring that up online. I definitely will want to know when he's about to be released, because if there are any hearings about it, I want to attend and state my feelings about continued collections.

On that point, Jane mentioned that they will docket the case out of its current state of being a criminal case into a civil one; it will now be up to me to pursue collection beyond this point. I have decided to at least check possibilities out. One suggestion Jane and the county attorney Greg Jenson gave me was to look into putting a lien or whatever onto any inheritance Tom may be entitled to from his parents when they pass away, i.e., their assets including property, stocks, bonds, etc. so that it would go to back child support first. If that's feasible, I will do that...What happened in March gave me some cynical hope that was confirmed - he didn't live up to his word. This way, we might finally see some concrete result. If not, I'll know we did what we could and no bitter feelings...

"To Muslims everywhere I issue this fatwa: any Muslim involved in the planning, financing, training, recruiting, support or harbouring of those who commit acts of indiscriminate violence against persons or the apparatus or infrastructure of states is guilty of terror and no part of the Ummah."

A thought-provoking article for all, but challenging to Muslims in particular...

A fascinating analysis of one of my favorite films, THE SWEET HEREAFTER...

Despite the almost mantra-like status of the statement "people are leaving the church" there still appears to be little understanding about who is leaving, when they leave, why they leave, and what happens to them and their faith after they leave.

- From Ten Myths About Church Leavers

I am one of those Christians that practice a 'churchless faith', as discussed in the above-referenced article. Why did I leave the church? I did not feel blessed, challenged, or that it was meeting any needs I felt at the time. In fact, I felt stressed because of my participation. I was a young parent, struggling financially and emotionally to keep my head above water and handle two very strong-willed children. The organized church family were there for me when I needed them, no doubt of that. However, there were times when I felt pressured to give back by spending time performing duties for the church that I didn't feel strong enough to give. I became resentful, sometimes taking it out sideways on my children by being emotionally uneven with them, sometimes gentle, sometimes lashing out in frustration when they were misbehaving and didn't seem to listen to reason.* I eventually came to realize something had to give. Going to church, participating in organized fellowship and ritual, were now a burden, not a blessing. Despite what seemed radical then, I simply quit attending church. I began to put myself - my physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual self - first. I set aside more alone time. I explored interests and hobbies. I opened myself to new ideas. In the end, that path has led me to where I am today - a much happier, fulfilled person, who has come to realize that I was very narrow in my beliefs before, not to mention naive. That there is much more of the Divine revealed in more ways than most people realize. I am a Christian still, but a more humbled one...

* Even in hindsight, I still must say I don't know if I would have done anything different with my kids; sometimes children are not as pliable as the books and experts claim!

The question of God, therefore, is not whether he is omnipotent – but in what way he employs his power and how he calls us to be powerful in him.

From Strangely Warmed, by Andrew Rumsey

"This model of the death-do-us-part, missionary-position couple is just a tiny part of human history," says anthropologist Kristen Hawkes, who has spent years studying the foraging habits of the Aché, a Paraguayan people, and the North Tanzanaian tribe Hadza, who also celebrate a rich love life. "The patterns of human sexuality are so much more variable."

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I called Daniel tonight to let him know he had mail. He said he has to move in 12 days because his friend Travis who he is living with said that they had made an agreement that it would only be for 30 days. He said that he'll be living in his van. I wasn't happy to hear about it, but oh well, what can you do? I am hoping he will work harder to find better work and/or better himself in general. I said something lame like "Well, if you work hard, things will get better..." and he said, "Mom, I know. I keep my head up..." I know he's trying to keep his head up, but I also know it won't be easy. It won't be easy for me, either, because you feel so bad when you see things bad for someone you love. BUT, I also know I cannot intervene...He must learn how to live on his own. He had a lot of time here at home to get things going OK for himself. When he was working for Nash Finch, making over $11 a hour, he had the job he needed and the opportunity he needed. He messed that up himself and was fired, and he admits that. Now, he's not working full-time all the time, depends on weather, and makes only $8 an hour. He's pouring some money into his van since it's old and
nickle-and-diming him to death, but I also know he's not putting as much into it as he should/could, spending a lot on fast food, cigarettes, and who knows what else. He said tonight that he has girlfriend problems, car problems, and living situation problems...he didn't mention work problems, thank goodness, but if he doesn't figure out a way to make more money AND how to use it more wisely, it'll be awfully cold come winter in that van...I asked my sister to remember him (and myself) in her prayers...to be strong and not allow him to manipulate me in any way...

In the end, if he learns, that's all that matters. If he doesn't, it's on his head...but it's really hard to see happen when you see such youth, promise, great personality, etc. just messing his life up...

One of course has to be careful here, for at key points in their history, those who take the name of Christ have displayed their perverse tendency to practice the opposite of what their Lord preached. The abuse of power in the church is a sin bordering on blasphemy and one made more offensive by the turning of a blind eye.

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Brace yourselves...it might be a bumpy ride...

I'm constantly amazed how the human body can manifest strange conditions and diseases. Take, for instance, vaginal conditions. As with other parts of the human anatomy (in this case, the female anatomy), there are many things that can go wrong. I personally have suffered vaginal polyps, after I gave birth to my first child, Eva. I didn't notice them right away, but eventually felt small bumps and knew it wasn't normal. A gynecologist confirmed them upon examination, and scheduled me for vaginal cauterization. Hearing that term was rather alarming, to say the least. In the end, it was a fairly painless procedure, thank goodness. The doctor felt it was important to take care of to be on the safe side, since such conditions can be indicative as pre-cancerous.

Oleg Volk does interesting perspectives. He captures unusual amounts of detail that can bring out the best (or worst) of people. Oleg is a talented man and brings out the best.

He recently shot my daughter. I must say, I think Eva is a fragile beauty; intelligence and compassion sing in her eyes....

I discovered a film today that hasn't been in wide release yet, so few have heard of it. I hope I have the opportunity to view it someday. I researched it online and found several sites about it and the history it is based on. It's a true story, you see, about men who went through extraordinary circumstances, and in turn, became extraordinary themselves. Not all reacted so positively, but they did. In particular, one man - Ernest Gordon...

Seniors in the early stages of Alzheimer's disease, with mild to moderate memory loss, are writing Web logs to help them make sense of their daily lives. And the activity, they say, is slowing the onset of their symptoms. "Keeping journals or engaging in other intellectual activity is good at any age...But it is particularly important to stay intellectually active as we get older, retire from demanding jobs and have fewer family obligations."

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My son Daniel moved out on his own on July 1st. He's having a tough time, but it's his own doing (not planning well and not budgeting well). I knew there would be growing pains in a big transition like that for him. I am purposely NOT bailing him out. Otherwise, he'll never take responsibility, learn, and become the man he can be...He lives here in town with an old friend of his for now.

Eva, my daughter, is due to deliver her third son this coming week. It could be any time, actually. She plans on taking it easy over the summer since she just graduated college and has a newborn. After that, she has many ideas about working out of the home, freelance writing, and also helping teach at the Islamic school her children attend. The school is founded and run by their Islamic Center and open to all Muslim families. I visited it when I visited in May, and it's a very nice place. After 9/11, however, they had to hire a man as full-time security. There were just too many threats and chances that something could happen. He's a middle-aged, ex-army man, tall and large and menacing if you don't know him. But he's actually very gentle and the kids love him. He patrols with a rifle the compound perimeter, and lives on the grounds...

Daniel, by the way, is working for a construction crew that does cement work - foundations, driveways, sidewalks, etc., etc. He's VERY tan, and muscular. In his spare time, he plays bass guitar with a garage band. He still hopes and dreams very much of perfecting his music and doing more with it.

I am glad he is striking out on his own, but am very surprised how much I miss him. He was always the one that despite everything else, was like a ray of sunshine in my life. Eva and I are very close now, and wish we didn't live so far apart. Funny how things work out. Eva and Daniel both didn't like me very much once upon a time, because I drew lines, shaky though they may have been at times being a young mother, but they were there. Some were crossed, some not. Those that were, I did the best I could...and I guess it was good enough. But as we all know, there are many parents out there that are good parents, but their hearts are still broken. It's a very hard job, isn't it?

My time (other than the normal work, etc.) has been occupied this last year with my parents, and after Dad passing away last August, with just Mom. Mom is in Chicago right now visiting my sister Sharon. She'll be back July 20th. On September 14th, she'll go for 2 weeks to visit Eva. Both Mom and Eva are SO looking forward to seeing one another. Eva saw Mom briefly last August for the funeral, but it's been a long time since they've had a real visit and spent any amount of time together. Mom also wants to see Salih and Bilal, as well as the new little one. This may be Mom and Eva's last time together. We never know what time we have...

My personal website has been reviewed. Man, these people are a tough audience! Personally, I adore my own site. It may not be 'professional', but it's me...Here is what they said...

The Journey


The first thing I thought upon opening The Journey was that this was a site of very little interest. All the entries seemed to be links to other sites with not even a comment about the link. I then attempted to look at the archives, to see if the author, Trish Lewis had anything more to say. The first four months of archives weren’t there. Not good. Finally, I found something, and began to read.

The weblog consists mostly of Trish talking about things that are important to her. This includes her family, religion, current affairs, and blogging itself, with many links to outside articles on the subject. Trish seems to be writing for herself first, and others second, meaning that some entries are not as interesting as others, how ever most make for a good read.

A pretty standard Blogger template is used, but that suits the site, as it is about content rather than looking good. One criticism I have is that the content of the site is very hidden – I clicked the Who am I link expecting to find nothing more than a short about page, and instead found a whole other part of the site. This index page is not very well laid out, but contains links to a number of interesting things, such as poetry and photographs. Again, these pages aren’t very well designed (one picture is a .bmp file, for example), but the content makes up for that.

I would recommend this weblog to people interested in subjects listed above, and those only interested in content, not layout, as the design detracts from the entries. If you can see through that to the writing inside, then this weblog is for you.

This site was reviewed on 2002-07-11 by Orange_Goblin.
They felt this site belonged in the Personal category.
Orange_Goblin felt that The Journey deserved a rating of 3.

---

On opening this site, it looks Celtic/Goth, with black, gray, and purple colors throughout. But when you click the Who Am I link, a startlingly cute fuzzy animal appears. This must be Trishymouse. I have to say this was about the last thing I was expecting to see, and I started to warm up to the mysterious author.

The author is an systems administrator and a writer. The purpose of her weblog seems to be to capture news and other quotations (with links) that point out the sinister aspects of the US government. In her Who Am I section, she describes her own life to an interesting degree of detail. She seems to be in early middle age, and this fits with her communication style. Her target audience would be other adults, especially those with a left-leaning and spiritual side.

The writing is thoughtful, careful, and expressive, adequate for readers who can relate to the author’s views and approach to life. She does not reach out to draw in readers who are neutral or uninterested to start with. If the author would like to draw in more readers, I’d suggest adding some chatty commentary text to each post. Personally, I like to feel that I’ve gotten to know the blogger a little bit, or I lose interest.

The design and the content are a little incongruous. The design looks severe and a little depressing, but the author shows an optimistic and tenacious attitude about life (if not about the Bush administration). In navigating the site, you have to rely on the back button quite a bit. More sophisticated linking would be helpful. This is a minor complaint.

If you visit the site, do read the Who Am I? pages. They provide interesting background about the author and her family. You can also read her poetry and see her photography.

This site is not so unique or interesting that I would recommend you visit it pronto. But it’s worth a look if you have something in common with the author, or are looking for a well-written personal weblog to add to your bookmarks. I rate it a 3.5.

This site was reviewed on 2002-07-11 by Ropejumper.
They felt this site belonged in the Personal category.
Ropejumper felt that The Journey deserved a rating of 3.5.

"What we write about does not define us as bloggers; it's how we write about it... As bloggers, we're in the middle of, and enjoying, an evolution of communication..."

- Meg Hourihan, from What We're Doing When We Blog

Happiness doesn't last. Happiness is appreciating what is. Then we forget...

Fertility symbols of the early celtic church? Warnings from the same against sins of the flesh? No one knows. But these symbols were carved all over medieval churches in Ireland and beyond...

From AlterNet:

We are cowed. Cowed by disinformation from the media, a skewed view of the world, and atrocious taxes that subsidize this permanent war machine. And we have no representation. Only the corporations are represented in Congress.

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AIDS isn't going away anytime soon...

From an article on WorldWatch:

“The new eugenic technologies are being actively promoted by influential scientists, writers, and others who see themselves ushering in a new epoch for human life on earth. They speak with enthusiasm of a ‘post-human’ future in which the health, appearance, personality, cognitive ability, sensory capacity, and lifespan of our children have all been genetically modified. They anticipate, with scant concern, the inevitable segregation of humanity into genetic sub-species, the ‘GenRich’ and the ‘Naturals.’” -Richard Hayes, executive director of the Center for Genetics and Society.

From Government Computer News, a followup story about what Bush is up to - more 'balance of power' issues, tipping in his direction of course...:

Appropriators criticize Bush's homeland security plan
By Charlie Mitchell, CongressDaily

Senate appropriators, weighing in on President Bush's proposal to create a Homeland Security Department, Tuesday sharply criticized language in the plan that would allow the department's secretary to shift funds among programs without congressional approval.

"The proposal by the president provides the new secretary with extraordinary powers, powers that potentially could tip the delicate balance of constitutional powers between the legislative and executive branches of government," Senate Appropriations Committee Chairman Robert Byrd, D-W.Va., and ranking member Ted Stevens, R- Alaska, said in a letter to Governmental Affairs Committee Chairman Joseph Lieberman, D-Conn. Lieberman's committee has solicited advice from other Senate panels as it crafts an amendment to implement Bush's homeland security proposal.

"These are powers that even the secretary of Defense and the secretary of State do not currently have, nor should they have," Byrd and Stevens wrote.

Full Story...

From The Bush Effect on Consortium News:

Less than 18 months into Bush's presidency, a nasty mixture of economic and international problems is facing the American people: a sinking dollar and a sagging stock market on one side and soaring budget and trade deficits on the other, with a backdrop of Bush's intent to press ahead with an ill-defined "crusade" to rid the world of "evil" over the advice of traditional allies in Europe and elsewhere.

One might call this predicament – the combination of a depressed economy, an inability to address pressing domestic needs, the alienation of key allies and an endless war – the Bush Effect.

Full Story...

"...Shall we add that, on that same September 11th, as on the day before it and the day after, more than 35,000 children died of starvation around the world, and that many of them must properly be seen as the casualties of the geoeconomic policies that the US (and its allies) assiduously and forcefully promote?

"We've all taken a crash course in international relations. We all know, again, that we're part of the world, and that we had best get used to it; and this, really, is not such a bad place to stand. Our self-satisfied sense of immunity is past, and good riddance. America, too, can suffer. America, too, will pass. We know this, or we may, once the adrenaline is gone. It's a new world. The question now is what we'll make of it.

"This is a small planet; we cannot escape each other...Given this, we have choices to make, many, many choices."

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